Monday, December 27, 2010

New Year's Resolutions

2011 is approaching quickly. It seems the older you get the quicker time goes buy. Well, I guess its that time of year where I start picking my New Year's Resolutions. I first want to go over things I am thankful for, and glad I have:
-Sugar cookies with frosting and sprinkles
-Electric blankets
-Health Insurance
-Trilyte alternatives, such as Miralax
-Those cute little popcorn tins that have cheese, butter, and carmel popcorn
-Healthy people
-Good people
-Jamba Juice
-Fry sauce
-My laptop
-My camera
-My hubby
-My pets
-My family
-My friends
-Online message boards
-Jetted tubs
-The health procedures I will get/have got done
-My contacts
-Rosetta Stone
-Door knobs that are not broken

Now what on earth I am going to make my New Year's Resolutions? Hmmm....any ideas? Here's what I can come up with off the top of my head:
-Get G.E.D.
-Get a good paying part time job
-Look into starting midwife schooling
-Get at least one more car (with 4 wheel drive)
-Put money into savings
-Pay off some debt
-Have a "real" wedding
-Get Corona's surgery done
-Upgrade my fish tank
-Get more organized in our living spaces
-Finish learning French
-Freshen up my American Sign Language skills
-Get blog sponsors
-Get at least 50 followers

I think those are good goals. Don't forget to follow me, so you can see how my New Year's Resolutions are going! Well lovelies, what are your New Year's Resolution?

Sunday, December 26, 2010

Keep on rollin'

How was every one's holidays? Good, I hope. I disappointed myself yesterday. I woke up all stoked for Christmas, I enjoyed it very much until about 1 o'clock. At noon I took my medicine and on top of making me put on like 5lbs every month, it has the fabulous side effect of giving me migraines, like the migraines that no pain med helps. I took pain pills every 6 hours trying to get this migraine to go away. Anyways we had breakfast with my in-laws, then we went to my mother-in-law's family's house, after that Joe and I went to my grandpa's. It was hard for me considering I have this way of torturing myself mentally. As I sat on the couch I pictured in my head everything Mama did last Christmas. I realized that this time last year I had no idea that would be the last time I would see Mama healthy. All the sudden a ringing phone brought me back to reality. My grandpa answered the phone and told my mom's husband to call the house phone. He calls and my mom answers, all I hear is my mom saying things like "Are you serious?" and "Where are they taking her?" and "Are you in the ambulance too?". I instantly remembered Joe telling me in the beginning of November, that he really doubts that the "one person dies every year" curse will continue in 2011. I go back to reality where we find out that my aunt keeps blacking out, not breathing, and convulsing. We left my grandpa's and went back to Joe's family gathering. I called every hour for updates, things aren't looking good. My aunt is in the ICU, and will be there for at least a week or so. The doctor wants to meet with the family tomorrow to decide what to do. I am worried and my mind just keeps flashing back to the past years where someone dies every single year. I am down to 3 close relatives, of course I have others, but most of them I don't talk to for personal reasons or they live out of state. As I sit there on the couch with this massive migraine, in a loud room, I sit there and think about last year. Last Christmas I was planning on moving, having a great job, having a "real" wedding, and continuing our future as a family. Most importantly I thought I would for sure have "the thing I want", and I would have a year where no one dies. Needless to say we can see that not one of those things happened. I am going to be honest, I not only went to bed for my migraine, I went because I felt betrayed and hopeless. I feel better today, or trying to at least. I was checking the news like I do everyday. I ran across a story about a paralyzed woman whose car was stolen and then found. It gave me a link to her website, which had a link to her blog. We all know, I love blogs. I read blogs of people from all walks of life. So I read every single post she made and I cried. I cried, because she is amazing, and even though she has had some bad stuff happen to her she "keeps on rollin'". I want to link you all to her blog. She is so inspiring and I think you all will love it... Mega-Stories

Thursday, December 23, 2010

Happy Holidays!

Happy Holidays my lovelies! I know I have been M.I.A., I have been so busy with the holidays coming up. I just wanted to thank you all for reading! I have readers on every continent now! I am quickly approaching 1,000 views and getting so excited! I plan on doing some giveaways once I reach 20+ followers. So don't forget to follow me! Anyways, I thought I could update you all with everything I have been doing lately. Last weekend my in-laws and I went to my sister-in-law Brandy's dance performance. They did the Polar Express. Here's some pics (they aren't the best quality, my camera seems to be having an issue that I need to fix)...
This one is Brandy.






We also had my cousin-in-law Tony's daughter Jordana's 1st birthday party. Jordana is seriously one of the best behaved babies I have ever met, she is so calm and happy almost all the time. She is making the "I am going to barf" look because she doesn't dig certain textures of food. Here's some picture of that...



And here is a bunch of random photos I took for the hell of it...






I also want to congratulate my cousin-in-law Amanda and her spouse Mike, on their new baby due in August.

Thanks for reading everyone! Enjoy your holidays!

Sunday, December 19, 2010


Don't worry, I am alive. I know I went 4 days without posting, I am sorry. Do you forgive me? I hope so. I have kind of been in a weird place, the past few days. I am going to enter the honesty zone here and tell you lovelies the truth. You know the angel and devil that sit on your shoulders? Well the devil has been awfully convincing the past few days. I don't even know how to explain the mood I have been in lately. I guess the best way to put it is, I have been questioning myself lately. 98 percent of the time I know what I am doing with my life, but there's always that 2 percent sneaking up on me and asking me if I really know, or if it's all in my head. Needless to say today I was an emotional mess, it was one of those screw-you-diet-eat-a-tub-of-ice-cream-and-watch-movies-in-pajamas days. One of the movies I watched was You, Me, and Dupree. In the end Dupree is talking about your "-ness", you just add ness to the end of your name, and it describes/is who you are. It got me thinking where did my "Jaz-ness" go? And I quickly realized I was letting the devil win. It occurred to me that hope seems to be the cause and solution to my 2 percent. When everything seems to be bursting in flames around me, I hold onto hope so damn tight it's eyes bulge. When I end up standing there in piles of ashes I realize that hope I was holding onto didn't do shit for me. Shit is still in ashes and I am still royally screwed. But what if hope, in some crazy way did help? I had never really looked at it this way before, but what if holing onto that hope so insanely tight is what stopped me from bursting into flames and ending as ash too? Just like that, everything I do, everything I am, made sense again. If you give up hope when you have nothing else, than really you just lost the last thing you had to hold onto, except the difference is you did it deliberately. Yes, I may pull a Homer Simpson some times and strangle hope because I am mad, but in all reality hope is why I am here, hope is what got me through the fire and made it possible for me to save everyone else. It is so crazy how these weird little things that most people don't think twice about some how snap me back into reality. In the end I think that's what life is all about, remembering who you are and staying strong no matter how bad things seem.

Thanks for reading!

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

The Struggle

Have you ever wanted something, that you go to desperate measures to get it? I have been wanting something for a long time now, and I am beginning to think about desperate ways of going about getting it. As a kid I wished for my dad to come back, so I could have a normal family. That was my wish for birthdays, Christmas, new years, and any other time I could wish. It got to the point I went around looking at men trying to figure out which ones would be a good daddy for me and thinking of crazy Parent Trap ways of getting my mom to marry this potential daddy. I now have an awesome father-in-law, so needless to say I eventually got my wish. As an adult I have been wishing and praying for something that I can not control whether I get. I now look back on my childhood and realize that things don't always come to you the way you expect. The thing I want has made me a different person, I have learned a lot and have gained respect for people who earn the thing I want. It's not easy but I know I am not alone and that helps. I know that even if people don't want the same thing as me, we all have that one thing we want in life and we are willing to put ourselves through hell and back to get it. It's insane the lengths I have gone to capture my dream, and yet I end up with the feeling that I am sure we all know, where you feel you are so close to your goal and yet so damn far away. I feel like my mother-in-law's jack russell, Charlie (aka Harley), he is obsessed with chasing his tail, and every time he tries he gets within an inch of catching it. He can see what he wants, but its just barely out of reach. I think the hardest part of situations like this, is when others get what you want so easily and yet you are working so hard. I know how you feel believe me. I will be the first to admit, I get insanely jealous, angry, hurt, and any other emotion out there but then I remember something someone once told me... "At least you know it's possible to get it, if they got it." This is so true, because at times I think we all feel, life is unfair and that some things just aren't possible to get, well guess what? They are possible to get, and life is fair to some degree. I think what we aren't looking at when we say life isn't fair is that, when we go through struggles we learn from them. I realized that the struggle I have gone through to follow one of my dreams has made me into a better person, but the person who got what I want without trying will learn the lesson I learned in a different way. Think about it this way, there's 3 types of learning: Seeing, hearing, and experiencing. We all learn in different ways, I learn best from experience, where as others learn lessons in other ways. Remember this, it may be a big struggle to get what you want, but at least you will appreciate it, when you do get it.

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

The Unfortuneate Ones

Yesterday, I noticed something that kind of really pushed my buttons, someone on Facebook was bitching about how bad their life was. This just really bugged me. I am noticing that some people act like their life is so terrible, I just don't see it though. I am not saying bad things don't happen to these people because I am sure they do, but if your life is so bad then why are you so happy? I see it often, these people that get everything they want with little to no effort, don't appreciate it. Can anyone please explain to me what is so bad about being healthy, having a roof over your head, having kids, having a secure/stable job, having a two income household, having loving family surrounding you, being able to afford nice things, etc? Maybe I am missing something but to me that's a lot to be happy about. I am not saying you can't complain, everyone does at some point, but why do people say things like "When is it my turn for something good to happen?" or "My life sucks!" or my personal favorite "F*ck my life, I just want to crawl up and die!". Am I crazy or are they? I personally have stuff to bitch about but I choose not to. I have been through hell and back, and to be 100% honest with you, I couldn't be happier with how things have gone. Obviously I wish somethings didn't have to happen but if those things happening means I get the privilege to enjoy life to it's fullest, and be grateful for what I have than by all means I am happy with my struggles. I have some medical issues as a lot of you know and yeah it really sucks that I am stuck with them, but by having one of them I have met some of the most amazing people that will be good friends for the rest of my life. I hate to think about not having these people in my life, and to me having loving, caring, excepting friends is very much worth the struggle. If you are offend, angered, or hurt by me posting all this, then maybe you need to take a good hard look at yourself. All you people with kids that bitch about it, or are about to have a kid, imagine how you would feel if your child got ripped away from you and there isn't a damn thing you can do about it? I know how it feels and I can tell you I would take a million more tantrums, sleepless nights, and I would be more than happy to give up all my hobbies (etc) just to get my baby back, but I can't, and I most likely never will. So I will take what I can from the experience and grow from it. All you people that bitch about your job, be damn happy you have it because this is a f'ed up economy and most unemployed can't get jobs. I will allow you to bitch without any judgement if you can give me a list of the good and the bad (and the bad has to be legit, not shit like your favorite shoe broke) and the bad out-weighs the good. Even then I will still pity you because you focus on the bad and can't realize the stuff you have that most people would kill for. Just remember everyone, appreciate what you have while you have it because it could be gone at any moment.

Saturday, December 4, 2010

The Frenchest Loaf of Them All

A few days ago I bought some active dry yeast, I have been dying to use it. Last night I decided to tackle my urge. I looked forever, trying to find a good beginners recipe for bread. I remembered my super awesome friend Merissa is great at making bread and once gave me a link to a recipe. I asked her for the link again, she was more than happy to give it to me. I got all the ingredients out, and dug my mother-in-law's bread maker out. After washing the bread maker and my hands, I started. I put all the ingredients in the machine then turned on the "Dough" cycle which surprise to me takes one and half hours. So while waiting for that I decided to go to my grandmother-in-law's to fix her laptop. When we get back Hubby tells me his brilliant idea for a new type of porn. I am totally up for it, I have always wanted to do something uber creative like that, not to mention anything that pushes boundaries usually has something to do with me. So while the bread was rising, we brainstormed different ideas and had a lot of fun. Once the bread is done rising I put the egg whites on the top, throw cheese on top and watch its deliciousness bake. Once it was done, I cut a tiny bit off to make sure it was cooked, then of course ate that tiny bit. Then I cut off more, threw some butter on it and moaned as the scrumptious bread released its cheesy, buttery flavor in my mouth. Here's some pictures. And the link to Merissa's page with the recipe.







Bread Recipe

Friday, December 3, 2010

Dear snake, please don't make me piss myself.

Last night, I was deciding what to make for dinner, I was debating between meatloaf, mac 'n cheese, a veggie, and fresh baked bread or my infamous chicken alfredo pasta, zucchini, and garlic bread. At the last minute I told dinner to screw off because we're going to the movies instead. When Joe got home, Joe, Jeremy, and I went to go see the new Harry Potter. Have you ever heard the story "If You Give a Mouse a Cookie"? Well I have my own version. If you give Jaz a movie ticket, she'll ask for popcorn to go with it. If you give her popcorn, she'll of course need a drink too. Oh how I love movie theater popcorn, in all of it's salty, buttery, goodness. Well I am one of those people that have to have a drink while eating. I honestly wonder how you people that don't drink while eating do it. I just get really thirsty. Because I love thy movie theater popcorn, I started eating it the 30 minutes (yes, I said thirty minutes. Joe insists on being crazy early to everything) we waited for the movie to start. So I ate popcorn and downed my drink. All the sudden the movie starts, and I need to pee, go figure. So I decided its in my best interest to hold it, mostly because Joe may or may not get really irritated if I came back and make him tell me in detail what happened. About 30 minutes into the movie I decided that was a really bad idea. I am one of those people who get really into movies, my therapist says it's because movies are like hypnotherapy. Needless to say while watching movies I get way jumpy. I won't ruin the movie for any of you who haven't seen it, don't worrry. Let's just say there was a few parts in the movie where I was saying to myself/to the snake on the movie who can of course hear my thoughts, "Please mister snake...don't make me piss myself!". I barely made it out of the theater, luckily the bathrooms were really close. While in the creepy bathrooms (which are really fancy if I must say so) the stall door next to me kept swinging open and closed. I looked carefully under the stalls in my best super spy style, sure shit there is no feet to either side of me. Being the paranoid person I am, I have a very detailed plan of what my crazy self would do in this situation. Note I am still peeing at this point. I slyly (is that even a word? Oh well, it is now) look up and to much relief see no one staring down at me, I look around and notice there is no vents. I start thinking about how the hell that door is moving by itself. "Ok Jaz, you're going to finish peeing. Then you will flush and while the toilet flushes reach in your purse, grab your awesome pink pepper spray, unlock it and have it ready for use. After you have it in your hand, walk out in front of the mirrors so you can make sure no one is behind you. As you approach the door put your hand with the pepper spray pack in your purse. While opening the door act like you're just putting away lip gloss so Joe doesn't realize how weird you are. Ok ready...and go!" I think to myself. I safely make it out the bathroom and we leave without the pepper spray being used. Another note: This all happened within 3 minutes, it just seemed like forever. P.S. Ladies, I bought my awesome pink pepper spray for $10 at a hunting store, I think it was Sportsmans Warehouse. I highly recommend every person, especially women carry some around just in case.

Call me crazy but I seriously have a plan for almost any given situation. These plans aren't just run away kind of plans, these are extremely detailed plans. I guess that's what happens when you grow up in the ghetto. Call me crazy all you want but when you see on the news "5'5, 120lb woman attacks house full of burglars while safely escorting family out of danger. She is now getting a street named after her (ok I wish)." on the news (and yes, it will be international news, because I am that awesome) you will know one of my crazy plans was not only useful, but it worked.

Thanks for reading!

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Cherry on Top

My fabulous friend Katie awarded me a fabulous award (see above)! You can check out her blog here

I was introduced to Katie online, and now she is one of my closest friends! Be sure to check out her blog! Thanks Katie!

I am passing this on to my 5 fave blogs:

Marly's Blog
Nadine's Blog
Rachel's Blog
Kelle's Blog
Christina's Blog

Here are the rules: Link back to the person who awarded you, and then pick five blogs to pass on the award too. Make sure to comment on the awarded blogs so they know they've been picked.

What Comes Around Goes Around

Sometimes, I have this insane urge to write. I whip out my handy-dandy laptop (OK, you're right. I didn't have to whip it out, it's pretty much always in my lap) and get ready to write something insanely inspirational. So I load up my blog and get ready to type these amazing words that you will savor forever, but all that comes out is a big fat empty screen. I never really know how my posts will come out, they may start out as funny, then leave you in tears. I just never know. My goal is to get you lovelies to feel the passion that flows so fluently through my body. I hope to encourage you to go tell that random person who looks like they're having a shitty day, how amazing they really are. So what if I should probably be doing something else with my time? I should be doing laundry or what not. You can tell my laundry I said "Suck it!"

When I was 12 or 13, my friend and I used to walk around downtown (we lived there). When we saw someone who was having a bad day we would, compliment them. Especially homeless people. I know how it feels to be so low, so sad, so hopeless. I know it meant the world to me when someone would do something to make me smile. Most people see homeless people and instantly critisize them. Why? Why as humans do we feel the need to point out other people's flaws and bad choices? I would/do hate when people do that to me, so why on earth would I do that to someone else? So next time you see someone pan-handling (asking for money), give them some. I don't care if you think they may just be "faking being homeless". It's good karma. I highly believe in karma, what comes around goes around.

Do you ever get asked what you would do if you out of no where recieved millions of dollars? I get asked that a lot, and I stop and ask the original asker, "What would you do?". They go off on all the fancy cars, houses, vacations, and more. To be completely honest with you, I would keep $500,000 to make myself comfortable (pay bills, buy a house, get surgeries I need, etc), and then I would donate the rest. People always tell me I am crazy. Why am I crazy though? Who says I need that money more than the dying children, homeless animals, family-less people? I can tell you right now I don't give a shit who thinks I am crazy for it.

Real quick before I sign off I want to thank all my readers for reading about Cliff. I especially want to thank those of you who donated to him. I love you all and you really are awesome. I have a lot of people asking me if we will adopt Cliff. I very badly want to I can promise you that much. There's a few things my hubby and I need to handle before we can for sure decide. If we can't adopt Cliff, I promise you we will be adopting at least one baby/child who needs us (if not more). I am going to let fate handle it. If you do have some advice, questions, wisdom, etc. to give us it will for sure be welcomed!

Thanks for reading, lovelies!

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Define: Perfect. Definition: Cliff.

Do you want to know what I hate about the holidays? I hate that too many people get conceited and only care about what they are getting on Christmas morning. If it were up to me you wouldn't get gifts for yourself, you would give to those who really need them. I am a huge charity and donation advocate. I donate every time that I possibly can. I don't do it for the tax credit. I don't do it to brag. I do it because long ago someone did it for me when I needed it.

You may have noticed a new button that is at the top of my side column. I know you're thinking "What is that all about?". Well let me explain. As most of you know adoption is near and dear to my heart. I plan adopting kids when we get a little more situated. Well that adorable little boy pictured in my new button is Cliff. He is perfect! He's so perfect he earned an extra chromosome. Let me tell you a little story...

When most people find out they are pregnant, they're ecstatic! They start talking about names, nursery decor, family traditions, and anything else baby related. The one thing most will never think about is "What if our baby has a genetic disorder?". When it comes time for the 'amnio' test, the parents-to-be don't think twice about it. That is until the results come back. When the results come back and they find out their precious baby has Down Syndrome, they full on panic. The doctors usually tell them the baby has a heart condition (which some DS people have) but fail to mention the baby has DS. Even when the doctor tells them baby has DS, they usually give the parents 3 options.
The option usually are:
1: Abort baby.
2: Give baby up for adoption.
3: Learn to care for baby.
Because so many people are uneducated about DS they choose option 1 or option 2. This means that there are thousands and thousands of babies aborted or given to orphanages. Sadly, Cliff was one of these precious, extra special babies. His parents felt they couldn't care for him. He is an orphan.


Look at that precious little boy. I would love to adopt him. If things work out the way they're supposed to, we might be able to look into taking this adorable baby home with us. But that is besides the point. Reece's Rainbow is raising money for his adoption. This will help his forever family pay for the adoption fees and any other expenses. So please, I am begging you to click that button at the top on my side column and read more about this precious bundle of joy. Donate $20 (or more)! I mean what else are you going to do with that $20? Go buy something that you probably won't use? Go out to eat at a fast food joint, that'll go straight to your thighs? Do you know what Cliff will do with your $20? He will get a forever home. A family to love him, kiss his boo-boo's, make him feel better when he is sick, raise him to be an amazing man. So think about it where is your $20 going to stretch the farthest, and mean the most? In your thighs? Or when Cliff gets to go home from school and show his family the awesome picture he drew? Who is going to appreciate that $20 more? Chances are in 20 years you won't even remember the pointless way you spent that $20. In 20 years Cliff will remember how he spent that $20, he got to have a bedroom that is his bedroom to sleep in every night, and a family that is his family, to love everyday. So you tell me where your $20 should go...

P.S. If you donate you will be in my heart forever. :)

Friday, November 26, 2010

And then I spit soda across the room...

How was your Thanksgiving, lovelies? I hope it was exceptional, excellent, gratifying, marvelous, satisfying, stupendous, wonderful, valuable, and everything in between. Mine was fabulous. We first went to go see my grandpa, he was doing a lot better than I expected (considering it was his first holiday without Mama). I got some jewelry that was Mama's. I look forward to passing it down to the next generation. Pictures to come once I charge my camera. Then we enjoyed the rest of the football, food, love, and happiness filled evening with my in-laws. Once almost everyone had left, Hubby, Jeremy (my brother-in-law), Jason (my cousin-in-law), and I went and played board games. We started with Last Word which was really fun. Followed by Imaginiff... which was entertaining. Ending with a hilarious game of Dirty Minds. We were all laughing so hard through out the board game time. At one point I attepmted to take a drink and right before I swallowed, Jason said something really funny and then I spit soda across the room. It only made everyone laugh harder. It was a great night!

One of the reasons I love blogging so much is because time goes by so fast as you get older. It hit me the other day that hubby and my fifth year anniversary is coming up in about a month! It seems like just yesterday we were in the awkward-getting-to-know-you-dating phase. I am learning to cherish these moments, I will never get them back. I am going to make memories and remeber them every chance I get. Before you know it we'll have babies, then time will fly by faster and soon they'll be gradutating school, getting married, and making us grandparents. Its crazy to think about and I never want to forget anything. I don't want to be one of those old people who can't remember that really awesome night where they shot soda across the room, played hide & seek in the dark, and more.

Thank you for reading!

Monday, November 22, 2010

"Hello good luck. Goin' my way?"

I think after 2 years (that's when our bad luck streak started) we are finally having some luck come our way! I feel sooo much relief! We aren't completely out of the woods, but we finally got a map with directions to the woods' exit. I am hoping by spring everything will be back to the way it used to be!

Happy Holidays everyone! And for my lovelies living here in the U.S. Happy Thanksgiving! I want you all to not spend so much time thinking about what is bad in your life, and focus on what you are thankful for. If you want to be really cool post your list of things you are grateful for in your blog (you can post the link in my comments) or just put your list in the comment section below.

I am thankful for...
-My hubby. He is amazing, he couldn't be anymore perfect.
-My pets. They are always so relaxing and stress reducing.
-My family and Hubby's family. Even though there is some rough patches, I love them and appreciate them.
-Hubby's job.
-My mother and father in-law. They have helped us more than they'll ever know and I hope to one day return the favor.
-My friends. I love them dearly. They are an amazing support system.
-Generous people. I am so extremely greatful for the people and animals who help others.

I am so greatful for you, my readers! Thanks!

Thursday, November 18, 2010


My head is spinning. My thoughts are going so fast. I feel stuck, I don't know what to do or say anymore. I feel like I am a kid again going on a road trip. I look out the window as we drive down the freeway and watch the poles fly by. I used to make a game of trying to read the signs before we passed them. That's how I feel now but the signs going by too fast to read are my thoughts. It is equivilent to trying to catch a fly in mid-air, every now and then you will actullay catch it, only for it to slip out a tiny crack in your hands.

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Cake Balls

For my birthday party on October 30th (my actual birthday is the 27th) I made cake balls instead of cake. Merely because I don't really like normal cake (I like it's balls ;D ). Everyone has been bugging me about the recipe so here it is! Now you can enjoy cake balls in your home too! I will probably make them again soon so I will add pictures when I do.

Cake Balls


1 box cake mix (about 18 oz)
1 can of frosting (about 12 oz)
2 bags of melting chocolate (each bag is about 12oz. You can use as many colors as you please.)
Various baking decorations (gel icing, sprinkles, whatever floats your boat)

~Handy Dandy Instructions~

Step 1: This is a little extreme and hopefully you can handle it! You need to bake the cake just like the box says.

Step 2: Recover from step 1. Are you ok now? Ok let us proceed.

Step 3: Let the cake cool completely. I think it would probably work to bake the cake the night before you want to dine on balls (cake ones of course).

Step 4: Now that you have cool cake (get it?) we are going to make it a little crumbly. Place sections of the cake into a large bowl, 1/4 of the cake at a time. Using two forks break the cake up into fine crumbs. Repeat until the whole cake is a bowl of crumbs.

Step 5: Now you will want to add the frosting. Don't add the frosting into your mouth silly, add it to the bowl. I prefer to only use 3/4 of the can, my hubby likes the whole can. Its a matter of how squishy you like your balls (sorry can't help it). You want to mix the frosting in the cake until you can't see the frosting anymore.

Step 6: Now gently roll the mixture into balls. Make the balls about walnut size. A small ice cream/cookie scoop/tablespoon will work wonders. You will end up having to wash your hands every 6 or so balls. Place your balls onto a cookie sheet.

Step 7: This is very important, DO NOT SKIP THIS STEP! Pop your balls into the freezer, uncovered, for at least an hour. The balls need to be firm when coating them so you don't end up with chunks of crumbs in the chocolate.

Step 8: When the timer dings after your hour is up, pull your balls out of the freezer. Now hurry and do step 9.

Step 9: Prepare your melting method. Use a double boiler, glass bowl over a pot of boiling water, or my method. My method of melting: Put chocolate in bowl. Microwave for 15 seconds, stir, microwave for 15 seconds, stir. Repeat this until it is or almost is completely melted. If you have a few tiny chunks in the melted chocolate you should be able to stir them and they will melt. DO NOT burn your chocolate! Now set your chocolate aside.

Step 10: You have a few option here. A: get lollipop sticks and put them into the balls. Then dip the balls into the chocolate and lay the flat side back onto the cookie sheet. B: Gently drop/set the ball into the chocolate and using a fork or spoon roll in the chocolate. Then gently pick up and place back on cookie sheet. C: Gently drop/set ball into chocolate and use spoon to pour chocolate over it. Then use fork to gently pull out and place on cookie sheet. D: Get creative.
It will take a minute to figure out what works best for you.

Step 11: Decorate! If your using icing, wait until the chocolate hardens. If not, then put decorations on while still melty.

Now your balls might still be a little frozen, if they are thaw them then serve.

Thanks for reading!

Enjoy your balls!

Saturday, November 13, 2010

Holy Psychic!

So I had to tell you lovelies about this (p.s. woot! woot! 7 followers! Thanks everyone!)....

So I was recommend to this group of psychics to maybe help me out with some personal problems/issues I am having. I posted basic info: name, picture, etc. One lady completely amazed me! She had me crying, freaked Joe out and just wow, this lady makes me believe in psychics. She told me she sees two angels around me and described Mama (my grandma) and my uncle Ken. There is no way she could have known about them. She even described the blanket that we buried Mama with because she wanted to take it to heaven. She said some more personal things that just had me completely amazed. It is good to know that Mama and Ken are watching over me. If you want the link to this group feel free to email me at

Monday, November 8, 2010

Random Chatter

So what's new with me? Well, I am happier now, I know Mama is in a better place. I cleaned my bedroom (OK I am almost done) and completely cleaned my basement. Tomorrow I am my bedroom. I will move the furniture to different spots and maybe plan out some cheap design aspect for when we can afford it. I am hoping my family likes what I do and I can be in charge of doing other people's living spaces. I am way creative when it comes to decor and my creativity is begging to come out and play. I think my first project will be making an ugly armoire (we got it free from Joe's cousin) cute. Maybe paint, new handles, and some curtains for it will make it fit in. After that I will make some curtains for my bookcase (mostly to keep my dog out of it, and to make it feel part of the room). Then I am going to find some new nightstands, aquarium (with stand), curtains for the window, and last but not least making a kick ass head board for my bed. I will post pictures of before, in the process, and after. Well my lovelies I am going to go enjoy my odd hobby of scrubbing grout. I will talk to you all soon!

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Live. Laugh. Love. Cry.

I scrubbed my grout today. Not only because I am insanely OCD, and it was dirty, but because I wanted to stop my mind from thinking. My thoughts are going a million miles an hour. My brain feels like the post office in North Pole, Alaska on Christmas, more thoughts and feelings are coming in then I can sort through. This time last year I was working my ass off, enjoying my family, coping with the loss of my uncle Ken, and genuinely loving life. Around this time last year I was sitting with my grandparents, my mom, my mom's husband, my aunt, and my hubby. Today I did the same thing, but this time was different. This time my whole family was gathered, wearing their best black attire, and my grandmother known as "Mama" was lying in a casket. She laid there looking so peaceful with her blanket, pictures of loved ones, roses, and a kitty cat Ty Beanie Baby. Everyone one was living, breathing, knowing this was the last time we would see Mama, laughing at different stories of Mama, loving each other with everything we have, and crying. Crying because Mama was no longer with us, crying because we were happy Mama was no longer suffering, crying because life is precious, and some of us were just crying. Mama passed away after months of suffering on Saturday, October 30th 2010. It is just like Mama to pass on Halloween weekend, she always told me she would go out with a "bang" and surprise everyone. She did just that. So as a family we will get closer, we will love harder, just for Mama. In my life I have at least one person pass away every year, it never fails. I don't know why it happens, what I do know is, it makes me live stronger, laugh often, love harder, and cry when I need to and not bottle it in. Everyone learns life's lessons differently, and I will continue to learn mine which ever way I need to. It does hurt so badly to keep losing people I love, but with the love and pain I can continue to grow and help the world and people around me with my knowledge and experience. So my lovely readers, go hug someone, tell them you love them and learn that love is stronger than we know and life is shorter than we care to admit.

Thursday, October 21, 2010

When my world stops spinning he is there for me.

Joe is my rock. I love him more than he knows. He has saved me so many times. When I was 14 my life was horrible, I was deeply into drugs and alcohol. Super depressed with no where to go he took me in. Everyone told him not to but he didn't care. I know if he didn't, I wouldn't be here typing this right now. He helped me over come my addictions, deal with the anger, rise above the depression. He is my hero. He has been there for me no matter what has happened. I love him so much. There are no words to describe it. When I want to give up, he pushes me to keep going. He lets me cry for no reason and knows to just comfort me. He never lies to me no matter what. He even took my baby sister in like she was his own. I loved watching them together, she loved him so much, he was her "Joe Friend".
(This is the only picture I have of them...sorry about the dogs, they really like each other)

I am the luckiest girl in the world. Almost 5 years now and we are still deeply in love, and that will never change. I laugh in the faces of people who didn't and still don't think we will last. There is no doubt in my mind that we will be together forever, even after death do us part. And just so this is documented, when I die I want to be cremated and turned into diamonds for any kids we have and Joe (yes it is possible, google it).





Thanks for reading!

Friday, October 15, 2010


My family is going to die from over eating! (insert evil laugh here)

So my wonderful readers, I have a secret to share with you. No, I am not pregnant so just push that thought out of your head. I am a addict...I am addicted to making food. I know right now you are thinking "So what? Tons of people are." But my addiction goes a little farther than just making food, I seriously dream about recipes. I wake up randomly in the night to jot down a recipe I made in my dream. Oh, and it gets worse. Most the stuff I make, I won't eat, not because its bad, but because I am picky and have a health diet due to a condition I have. At first I thought I just really liked food, but then I realized I don't think I do, I just love making it. Any reason to make food I will take it and run with it. As some of you know my birthday is coming up on the 27th, people were asking me what I want, the cards/money to support my food making addiction or cookbooks. Hey at least its not a drug addiction. So once my hubby gets paid I will be making my family an amazing meal that will make them do the number where you keep eating until you feel the need to vomit from too much food. My fabulous friend Merissa (click her name to check out her awesome blog)turned me one to a website that I am purely in love with, tons of awesome recipes! So the recipes I am making are: Chocolate Chip Sweet Rolls for breakfast, Roasted Potato Wedges and Mozzarella Sticks as appetizers, Bread, Restaurant Style Potatoes, Asparagus, Homemade Macaroni & Cheese for the sides, Bacon Wrapped Meatloaf for the main dish, and Molten Chocolate Lava Cakes for dessert. Hungry yet? Plus I am going to make my birthday dessert when the time comes. So needless to say my family will be fat and full by the time I get my food making fix. I will have pictures soon enough, don't panic. I will leave you to drool now.

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Wouldn't it be nice?

I want to tell you all of this reoccurring dream I have.
I wake up and it is a flawless day all around the world, not too hot, not too cold. I throw on my my sequin body suit, my favorite jeans, and my much loved zebra ballet flats. I grab my family (even the non human ones) and my favorite mix CD. I pull my car out into the middle of the street and play my favorite songs (I will add them to the play list if they're not already on there). I just start dancing, because life is that great. One by one people start coming out of their homes and dance with me. We don't care about race, religion, what group someone belongs to, we are all just enjoying ourselves and each other with one common interest life. Slowly the street dancing spreads through out the state, country, and the world. Just one place where everyone is happy, we all dance as one. No war, hate, discrimination, just love and happiness. Some of us are awesome dancers, some of us are just straight up hilarious, but it doesn't matter we all enjoy each other's dancing. The few that are shy, I approach them and get them moving. The day ends with amazing food that is like a world wide pot luck, smiles, laughter, love, happiness, what life should be like.

This is the dream, that reminds me why I work so hard to become a better person. This is what fuels my soul, happiness, hope, and effort. I know there is only the slightest chance that this will ever happen, but hey a girl can dream right? Life is my playground. Life is your playground. Life is every one's play ground. Why waste it with hating others, being disrespectful, just negativity in general. Life is one big party and you bet your ass I am going to party hard and celebrate it!

Monday, October 11, 2010

I triple dog dare you!

A very simple, yet very meaningful quote my uncle once said to me is....
“How do you know?”

Right now you're thinking “What the hell? Why is that so meaningful?”
Well it starts out like this, I found out I was moving from St. George, Utah where I lived with my uncle back to Salt Lake City with my mom. I remember when my uncle told me I told him “That's stupid and it sucks!” He very calmly asked me “How do you know?” back then I was thinking what you were thinking and very possibly are still thinking....”What the hell?”
Now I sit here with a million things running through my mind like Corona when she's had too much sugar...remind me to never give her whip cream again. I started thinking about how right now I would have been living in a beautiful house with my pets and Joe in Las Vegas. I made some choices that made that plan extinct. I thought today “I am still in this damn state, nothings changed, and I royally messed things up. This sucks!” My uncle's infamous question popped into my head, so I asked myself “How do I know?” I got to thinking about it, how do I know that we wouldn't have moved to Las vegas and been even more royally screwed than we are now? I think about how if we had moved down there I wouldn't have had become friends with the two most amazing friends I could ever ask for, I can't imagine my life without my two best friends Marelin and Nate. I love them, I know they will be in my life forever. So now going back to me, asking myself “How do I know?” Well I guess I don't, I don't even slightly know. I have realized that I love my insane, constantly difficult, catch 22, humorous, family and friend filled life. Yes at times it does drive me crazy that most my friend's have their own house, are married, have kids, have a more than stable financial situation, and more. But what they don't have is the amazing life I have, I get to laugh every day because my family and friends are hilarious even when they aren't trying. I get to awake up in the middle of the night to laugh when Corona got bored and stole our blanket and Joe is confused on how the blanket just went missing, while Corona is doing the cutest dog laugh in the world. I get to laugh when Corona drops her bone in the toilet and makes Joe spend 15 minutes trying to get it out. I get the joy of going to the store and while sitting in the line I decide to grab Corona a sucker, only to later look at my receipt and realize it says I bought “Leslie's ass”. I am happy, some times I may not show it but deep down I am always smiling. There's a lot of people around me (and everyone else in this world) who start drama for their personal enjoyment. When someone says something hurtful to me I no longer feel bad for me, I hurt for them, because to me it is heart wrenching that in order for them to feel happiness they have to hurt others. They are too blind to see that this world we live in is full of happiness and beauty. I hope that one day they can feel the happiness I do, no matter what they did to me. If everyone felt happiness we couldn't be mean.

Every day I sit out on my front porch with Corona, and every day the little neighbor girl Charly, who is around 4 years old, opens her garage, plays the radio nice and loud and demands I watch her dance. After she dances for awhile she comes over and asks if she can pet Shadow, and every day I have to explain that Shadow went to heaven, and this is Ona. Now I just let her believe that Corona is Shadow, maybe when she is a little older she will understand better, but for now if petting “Shadow” is what makes her happy who am I to ruin that? Anyways, everyday when she puts on her little dance show I wonder what happens when we become adults? Why don't we just randomly break out in dance because we are happy, and we really love this song? When we become adults we become up tight-constantly stressing-worrying about something machines. So lets do this old school style......
I triple dog dare you to just dance, no matter the reason, even if you are as cool of a dancer as Joe, or as awesome as my sister-in-law Brandy, just dance. And even "Bleed out rainbows" (Charly's brother Bridger's rule) if you want. I triple dog dare as Charly says “That means you HAVE to!”

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Sucking every bit of sunshine from black clouds...

Hey everyone, sorry I haven't posted recently. I found out a few days ago that my grandma is in the hospital. She has been very sick lately and her brain has shrunk quite a bit and she is now under 100 lbs. She has a lot of memory loss and the doctors just found out she has Pneumonia too. It's hard to Say if she is going to make it, and if she does she will have to be in a nursing home for the rest of her life. I am hoping she makes a little longer since her first great grand child is going to be born any day and she was very excited about that. I am still trying to deal with the loss of my uncle (father figure), he passed a little over a year ago. I really can't handle another death any time soon. So here is my best attempt at sucking out any bit of happiness out of this black clouds and lightening situation...

When I was in 3rd grade I lived with my grandparents. My grandparents are very classy, elegant, proper people. I remember they were very strict with me. One day it raining and my grandma never drives in bad weather so she stayed home from work. She came downstairs to my room and said "Sadie, do you want to stay home from school today and have a girls' day?" I got excited and of course said yes. That day was one of the best days. We sat in bed, ate sweets, ordered tons of stuff from QVC, talked about life, played with her dogs, and just had good quality time together. I loved that grandma and I had our own super, special, secret girls' day! She let me play a casino game with her, I even got to choose names for her hundreds of beanie babies, she taught me how to apply make up in a classy "timeless" way that she does. That day I remember her telling me "Dear God, when I die if someone dares bury me in polka dots I will haunt them for the rest of their life!" At the time I was so young I didn't realize how important that sentence would be. There's one thing I know about my grandmother and that is, she dresses very classy and CAN'T stand bad fashion! So today I sat in bed thinking about my grandma and I started to cry as I thought of that wonderful day. I learned so much. I was mostly crying tears of sadness, but every now and then I would laugh or smile as I remember that day and her. Now I sit her wondering if I am going to have to find the perfect burial outfit for my grandma soon, and how on earth am I going to convince everyone that it is what she wanted and she will haunt you if you put her in anything else.
My uncle died from lou gehrigs (sp?) disease. A few months before he passed he came to salt lake to visit me and the rest of our family. We went to a nursing home where he was staying. I couldn't help but realize he was the youngest one there and that he would probably be the first to die too. We sat there and had conversations, all of them avoiding the unfortunate obvious fact that death will occur soon. I sat there trying my hardest not to cry and I wouldn't/couldn't talk about what was going to happen. After about an hour my uncle said he was getting tired and needed to rest, my aunt told him to let me go with him, but he refused because he didn't want me to see him hooked to machines. I so badly wish I could go back and tell him it doesn't matter and that I so badly want to spend as much time as possible with him, but I didn't say that then because I couldn't stand being weak and vulnerable. That was the last time I saw him, and every single day I regret not saying what I was thinking.
Fast forward to now. My grandma is sitting in the hospital possibly going to die and I haven't visited her. I keep coming up with excuses even though we all know the real reason is because I fear emotion and things I don't have control over. I try to talk myself into going but I think what if I cry and can't stop or what if she sees how upset I am and it upsets her. I don't want to make the same mistake again, but I seem to be going down the same path.

Thanks for reading, hopefully my next post will be a little more upbeat. I will leave you all with the words that have been running through my head for the past week or so...
Grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Completely Content!

It is completely quiet in here (besides the sounds of our fish tanks), everyone is sleeping besides my 4 goldfish who are digging up the plant seeds in their tank. Joe is sleeping like a baby....
Corona is dead asleep and for once not snoring....
I imagine she is dreaming about the sausage biscuits she saw on TV earlier...
My rats Gianna and Tessa are cuddled up sleeping together (sorry I couldn't get a better picture, I was trying not to wake anyone)....
Even my Betta Teal and my frog Twinkle are sleeping....
As I sit here I can smell Corona's feet, which as odd as it sounds smell like warm Doritos chips, not to mention she has the cutest little, soft, ticklish feet around....

So now I sit here feeling horribly sick from the flu, but I am still very, very happy and type, I will tell you all about my adventures this week. Something incredible happened this weekend, I finally got a picture of "Catcoon". Some places worry about big foot or chupracabras, or lake monsters, but here in my neighborhood we have the Catcoon. This "cat" is believed to be half cat half raccoon, it is very aggressive, but oh so cute! So I present to you all....The Catcoon!
I have been trying to get good pictures of Catcoon (which is most likely an inbred cat) for weeks.
OK on to another fun overload.....
Here in Salt lake city people aren't friendly, have barely any compassion, and are fairly antisocial, but there are 3 things that bring this county together: 1. Gay Pride Festival (which is uber fun and I will get tons of pictures of it in spring 2011) 2. A tragedy (such as the fire we had last week) 3. The Utah Utes (our university football team that kicks some major ass)!
Last night we went to the game where over 45,000 people sat and cheered for the same thing. This is what I look for in a community is closeness. Over 45,000 people from different walks of life joined in one place with one common goal...the Utes kicking some major ass! The night before the game Joe asked me to shave his head (which I do every few weeks), so I offered to shave the "U" (utes logo) in his hair so here are the results, and yes I did this with the electric trimmers....
Then before the game I painted his face for him (this picture was taken in the middle of the game so due to the hot weather there's some sweat/sunglasses marks)....
Now out of all the fans there, in this picture I circled the opposing teams seats....
Yep, that's right, there was probably less than 100 other fans.
Here's the rest of the pictures....

And last but not least here's some pictures of Corona.....
I love when they cuddle, it screams peace and love!
I am not too sure why she sleeps like this, but she does almost every single night.
She loves to go under our blanket and play.
I love when she rests her head on me!
Here she is licking her chops and drooling on me because I am eating candy....
Now she gives me the strategically planned pouty lip....
Then she acts like she doesn't even care that I am not sharing....
And then I finally give her the box with 3 candies left over, and it makes her day! Sorry the picture is blurry, she wouldn't sit still.

Thanks for reading everyone! I am going to go relax and hope I get feeling better!